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Articles -- Change is not only possible, but inevitable
“I am ready to take responsibility for my life and move into my next inspired vision”
Despite the fact that autumn happens every year, we Canadians still complain at the first signs of cooler weather and diminishing daylight hours. But change is a part of life and we can choose to complain or to appreciate every phase of our lives. Autumn brings spectacular forest colors and winter brings picturesque snowfalls. We can choose to welcome the beauty of every season.
There are changing cycles in jobs and relationships as well.
In a job, you move from a learning phase into competence-and-refinement and eventually you may experience boredom and loss of interest.
Similarly, in a relationship, you spend the first phase in rapturous discovery; then you refine the ability to share and enjoy. And eventually things may become comfortable but uninspired.
Each stage has both challenges and opportunities. In the learning phase you have to be willing to admit you don’t know and maintain a passion for learning. In the second phase you enjoy a feeling of competence, but when unexpected circumstances arise, you must be willing to get into the learning mode again and call on your creativity.
The final phase is the most challenging because it often stimulates fear about the possible need to change jobs or partners. But in reality, the primary transformation called for is self-transformation. The question to ask yourself is, “Who do I want to be? What change in myself am I looking for?”
You may be in a technical job and be yearning for more people interaction. In order to realize this new image, you may decide to move into a training position, or you may start to organize company outings, or you may decide to change careers. There are many options. What is important is that you move towards the new image of who you want to be.
In the area of relationships, the approach is similar. A thriving relationship is one where both partners continue to grow, both individually and together. And so, when enthusiasm wanes, it is time to ask what transformation within yourself are you looking for.
You may want to take up some artistic endeavor, or go traveling, or pursue a new field of interest. It is quite common that as soon as one member of a couple finds a new hobby or interest, the partner is also inspired to find new interests. This brings renewed excitement to the relationship because you now have new things to share and discover about each other.
Going through changes in life is not only fun, but essential. The cycle of learning, gaining competence and boredom repeats throughout our lives as we move from one new skill to another. Keep in mind that the change you are looking for is a change in yourself and when you focus on that, all the rest will follow.
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